STILL

STILL for RENO OUT mag, June 2008

I am starting this article while sitting on a table rock above Callahan Ranch in Reno where I live. I can see Washoe Valley, the Sierra, the Virginia Range and all the Truckee Meadows and it only took forty minutes of hiking for me to get up here. A prize view for so little effort. The outdoors is where I feel at home. No matter if it is bright and calm or dark and snowy, this is where I can connect with what is inside of me and find not only answers, but peace. I often write my column while hiking, pen in hand scribbling what I hear inside me.

Earlier today, I was at the Convention Center at the Women’s Expo and enjoyed a complimentary massage by your editor’s partner, Adrienne or “A”. She asked me to sit in the chair while she finished up with someone and we immediately gave each other a knowing look. ”A” knew and I knew that sitting down while I waited was not an option. I would have rather interacted with dear Cheryl in the massage chair or any one of the many friends I saw passing by. The exchange started me thinking . . . it has been told to me throughout my life that I do not do “still” well. True. But what is still ?

Most of the absolute truth that I know is God-based. When I think of the word still, my next thought is the verse from the book of poetry, the Psalms. In it David, the great King of Israel who knew everything from great successes to utter failure, writes “Be still and know that I am God.” Not easy when he was being chased after by yet another man that wanted to kill him! (You want to know the real story of David? Read how he seduced a beautiful woman, got her pregnant, tried to cover it up by bringing her husband home from war to sleep with her and then, having him killed on the front lines.) Yes, this is the David that God loved and said searched for Him in earnest. Makes me know I am never too far from God that I can’t find my way back. I will NEVER get that far off the path! When David said “be still”, he was saying essentially -- chill out. So, how do you find calmness, serenity in even the normal schedule of the day?

How is it possible to be in a whirlwind or to go on a strenuous hike and quietly listen? This can be a challenging thought. I had to really consider this. I went back to my Bible and read the verse in an easily read version called The Message and it says “Step out of the traffic, take a long loving look at Me.” Next, I looked at the Hebrew root of the word “still” and it is the same root as the word for “to heal”. Hmm…how do you “step out of the traffic” and heal and recover from all the busyness? For me, it is clearly hiking every day. Even though I do not have television, I find it difficult to focus on what is going on inside me at home. Too many distractions. BUT, when I get my foot on dirt and rocks, I can focus. I can hear. I can process.

Several years ago, I was going through a very difficult time in my marriage. Each day I went up into the canyons (hence, my screen name and now company name-Canyonwalker Connections), and literally laid a rock every day on a pile I created and said to God, “I will do what I need to, just tell me, guide me.” I was building a reminder to my commitment to listen. I continue to do that every day, but now with my dedicated outdoors time. I step out of the traffic and take the time to help get me on the path I should be on, literally and figuratively.

Where do you go to find peace? Peace is usually not found with another person. Some find it in meditation, running, biking . . . . looking into the sky. I suggest that if you have no current space where peace exists, try getting outdoors. We live in a premier spot on the planet. You do not have to go far to get into nature. Every quadrant of this valley has trail heads. Tahoe is a jewel and we have it within a half hour of most of us. My dear friend, Mike White, has written three books on hiking in this area: “Afoot and Afield, Reno-Tahoe”, “50 Classic Hikes in Nevada” and Wilderness Press “Lake Tahoe”. Each is an excellent guide. Go stop by REI and ask most any employee, Mike included, for tips. Visit washoecountyparks.com and search for trailheads and find one near your home.

This summer, I will finally have the time to complete the Tahoe Rim Trail with my buddy, Netto. We have walked many hundreds, even thousands, of miles together over our eight years of friendship. Conversation on a trail beats conversation at Starbuck’s. There are no distractions. We know everything about each other. Tomorrow, I leave for China and she is my roommate and walking pal there too. We will see things others may not because we are trained to absorb while in motion.

Each day I spend a dedicated amount of time out in hills with my dogs. They have “heard” it all from the pain inside that I cry out to conversation of laughter and heart with my dearest friends. I am convinced that the changes I am now deep in the midst of were born on these walks. If I were to listen to others all the time, if I were to get consumed in the traffic and noise of problems, if I were to bury myself in television, I do not think I would now be as focused as I am on intent for my life.

Next month, I will be starting a process of conversation between disparate groups with my friend Denise Cordova of Light of the Soul Church of Christ, and open and affirming church. We will be having discussions with as many groups as we can insert ourselves into in hopes of having open conversations between the gay and straight communities and the Christian church at large. I feel this is the beginning of my significant contribution to bridge-building. This direction and the confidence to pursue it were paved on those unpaved roads I have walked for years. I believe I have been still enough to focus and hear new thinking. What are you missing out on by being busy? What is the world missing out on by you being busy?

The snows have melted, the trails are open….go enjoy them alone, with a partner or your dogs. Step out of the traffic and go sweat and be still. And then, do not be amazed when some new ideas take birth in your head and life, there is gold in “them thar hills” and it may well be inside you striving to come out. Happy trails!

Kathy Baldock
kathybaldock@helloworld.com